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(smartshanghai.com)
Updated: 2008-02-14 11:15

Now, I've done a little researchinto the crotch artsbut in the arena of high-end designer underwear for men I was at a loss. I place the blame on inadequate schooling. I placed my trust in AskMatsumeto lead me in the right direction for options in Shanghai. She referred me to two locally-based vendors of quality men’s undies: TOOTand MANifesto. ...And I placed my balls firmly and resolutely in their courts.

MANifesto

Men's underwear in 2008 will be about making a statement. Sometimes that statement will be a sultry whisper, "Look what I've got for you here"; sometimes that statement will be a puckish, nonchalant dismissal, "Oh am I wearing devilishly sexy undies? I hadn't even noticed. More wine?"; and sometimes that statement will be a bellowing avowal: "I have, on my person, junk so thunderous that most people can't even comprehend it let alone experience it."

Men, if you're brave enough to make this ultimate statement, allow me to introduce C-IN2, or better known as THE SLING.

On the surface, they look like your standard, innocuous men's jockeys but upon further inspection a dangerous and rebellious architecture reveals itself: in addition to a fortified, buttressed and expanded penile region, an elastic loop hangs down from the waistband on the front-inside -- affixed to which is an "adjustable barbell."

Now to put these on, one feeds one's nuts and bolt through this elastic loop and adjusts the barbell for size. The elastic -- in effect -- lifts you up and flings all of you forward, so your package is not drooping melancholically between your legs, but is rather thrust forward triumphantly proclaiming its divine presence for all the world to see and fear.

Available exclusively at MANifesto, "The Sling" is basically a men's Wonderbra for your man bits, and fellas ... you've come a long way baby.

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