Live a happy life or a meaningful one?
Updated: 2012-11-21 07:18
By Ho Chi Ping(HK Edition)
|
|||||||||
Psychologists studying the key to a good life have reached a very interesting finding that could affect the future of some of the men and women reading this. They have discovered that there are two distinct paths to a good life - and although the life of either group could be termed both good and happy, the lifestyle of one group would be far more satisfying and indeed gratifying.
The largest group of people interviewed regarded their lives as happy and successful. And those two qualities - happiness and success - were the extent of their wishes. They were content to continue on the path for the rest of their lives.
Those in the smaller group chose to lead what they termed a "meaningful life", during which they enjoyed not only happiness and success, but also gained gratification from making a positive contribution to their fellow humans.
And who were judged the happier and better-adjusted? The second, smaller group. Those in the larger group seemed to have a fixed mindset about contributing to their community. "Not my responsibility" sums up their reaction. And fair enough, it should be said, for couples with several children needing to be fed, clothed and schooled, but eventually financed to pursue their studies at university.
Whether in your previous life you had been content simply to be successful and happy, this time round you would become a person enjoying a meaningful life as a volunteer taking part in various neighborhood/community/national, and even international activities, in the hope of making a difference. Therefore you had morphed into a more serious-minded person, happy to indulge in charity work, hence not only happy and successful, but actually enjoying what had become your more meaningful life.
A person who enjoys a meaningful life is a man or woman who does not just "take" from life without giving, but "gives" as well as takes. A meaningful man or woman makes a positive contribution to society through activities undertaken of their own volition with no thought of financial compensation. We are talking about somebody who doesn't take for granted everything that life offers, but demonstrates gratitude by giving back to the community unconditionally.
"Ah, yes," you might say, "but I'm not cut out to spend years in the jungles of Africa helping the pygmies cope with deforestation, birth control and other problems."
No, that's not what we're talking about. Look around your community and see where you could make a positive contribution to society such as perhaps helping to drive poor disabled people to clinics for treatment, or becoming a voluntary part-time helper at the local blind institution. Maybe you are a talented amateur artist who could give tuition to keen young dabblers, or a whiz at computers and IT who could assist old people come to grips with the new technology. In short, take an interest in the myriad activities in your community and see where you might fit in. And then, good sir or madam, you will be living the sort of meaningful life we are talking about.
The psychologists found their sampling of nearly 400 subjects showed that happiness was largely oriented in the present, while being meaningful involved integrating past, present and future. Happiness in its simplest form was linked to being a taker but not a giver, whereas meaningful people tend to be givers rather than takers.
Although a meaningful life means to some extent suffering for a greater cause, the psychologists nevertheless agreed that meaningfulness is still the better path.
Interestingly, the researchers may not be entirely right, as both groups probably can have it all, according to a famous Chinese proverb:
If you want happiness for an hour - take a nap.
If you want happiness for a day - go fishing.
If you want happiness for a year - inherit a fortune.
If you want happiness for a lifetime - help someone else.
The author is deputy chairman and secretary-general of China Energy Fund Committee, a think-tank on energy and Chinese culture.
(HK Edition 11/21/2012 page3)