Many expats say China is a smoker's heaven and a quitter's hell. A halo of smoke hovers above most friendly male-to-male interactions, and sometimes, refusing to light up can damn a guest to a most undesirable loss of face.

Packets of cigarettes are common gifts for participants of fangwen (official visits), and hosts are particularly keen to load up out-of-town visitors with local brands.

I was recently on a fangwen, along with a non-smoker, who found it impossible to refuse a gift of top-brand cigarettes. The VIPs handed them over with a grin and a nod.

My poor pink-lunged friend accepted the offerings with a reciprocal smile and a dip of the chin, and puffed away.

He later lamented: "You can't get away with not smoking in certain circles in China." It's the exact opposite in the United States, where you can't get away with smoking in certain circles.

An American friend, who lives in San Diego, told me recently she quit because she found herself always looking for an excuse to get out of social situations to get that nicotine fix.

According to 2007 figures from the World Health Organization, China is the No 1 consumer of tobacco products in the world. About 60 percent of men and 3 percent of women smoke.

The figure for American smokers dropped to less than 20 percent this year, according to the US Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. In my hometown of Midland, Michigan, smoking has been outlawed practically everywhere aside from one's own home. There is no smoking within 8 m of any public building, meaning I can't even light up in the middle of the street.

When I took my brother to register for college last year, the policy had changed so that tobacco, including smokeless forms such as chew, wasn't even allowed on campus at all under penalty of a fine.

In the US, and most of the rest of the West, smokers are viewed as black-lunged, black sheep, whereas for men in certain situations in China, refusing to light up can threaten to extinguish a good rapport.

That's not to say one can never refuse, and most of the time, it's quite acceptable to decline. It depends on the situation and host.

Here, a cigarette is a unit of social currency; its brand is a status symbol, and offering one to another person is a handshake, a smile, a toast and a pat on the back, all rolled into one as you wait for someone to strike a match.

Before coming to China, I was at a personal record low of three a day. At university, I had been puffing more than two packs daily. When I came to China, that progress went up in smoke the first time I sat down at a table with a gracious host, who filled me with as much food, alcohol and nicotine as I could take - and then gave me more.

I came close to quitting again earlier this year when I was bedridden with an excruciating cough, which caused my entire respiratory system to sting with searing pangs. It made me think of how much suffering the respiratory disease my smoking might cause later in life and I vowed to quit.

But my resolve was quickly foregone when I left my bed for a world of cheap, convenient and socially acceptable smoking.

Frankly, after that I, like many people, had resigned myself to the notion that it was impossible to quit while living here.

But having seen many friends kick the habit in recent weeks, I've come to realize this was just another excuse to justify not doing so.

People, such as me, who are keen to quit while living in China need to realize the fact that smoking is all too easy and this is the biggest obstacle.

After that, we just need to work through the thousands of other excuses, but we must realize it is people that make their own heavens and hells - not the countries in which they live.

(China Daily 12/09/2008 page20)