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 Here are words of comfort for anyone who has spent more time than he should in online chat rooms -- a British psychologist has found that courtships begun in cyberspace can very well lead to true love.
Many "virtual" relationships thrive once potential partners meet face-to-face because they already know each other so well through their online encounters, said Jeffrey Gavin, a lecturer in psychology at the University of Bath.
"Chat rooms don't lead to shallow and impersonal relationships," Gavin said in an interview. "They lead to really close relationships because people express themselves more freely and are more open and honest on the Internet."
Gavin carried out in-depth interviews with 42 regular chat room users aged 19 to 26 years. Of the volunteers he studied, 29 reported close friendships or romantic relationships with people they met online, with 21 progressing to face-to-face meetings. One couple became engaged to be married.
"What tends to happen is that, when they meet, it's a fairly smooth transition from online to offline because they know each other so well," said Gavin, who presented his findings to the annual conference of the British Psychological Society (BPS) in Blackpool on Friday.
"Online, guys can be more emotionally honest and open, while women can be more overtly sexual."
His research also showed that most chat room users tell a few white lies about their height or the color of their hair. But in most cases they were minor misrepresentations rather than outright fabrication.
"They still seem to comply to the social norms around the body," said Gavin. "So the guys tend to make themselves sound blond and blue-eyed, while the women add a bit of blond to their hair or increase their bust size slightly.
"It's true, twelve of them told outright lies but the rest just exaggerated slightly."
(Agencies)
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英國(guó)一位心理學(xué)家最近發(fā)現(xiàn)網(wǎng)上戀情很有可能發(fā)展成為真愛(ài)，這則消息格外迎合那些成天泡在網(wǎng)上聊天室里的網(wǎng)友們的心理。
英國(guó)巴斯大學(xué)的心理學(xué)講師杰弗里·加文說(shuō)，許多網(wǎng)友通過(guò)在網(wǎng)上的接觸彼此已經(jīng)十分了解了，因此當(dāng)他們?cè)诂F(xiàn)實(shí)生活中見(jiàn)面時(shí)，他們?cè)诰W(wǎng)絡(luò)空間的"虛擬"關(guān)系往往會(huì)得到很順利的發(fā)展。
加文在接受采訪時(shí)說(shuō)："網(wǎng)友們?cè)诹奶焓依锝⑵饋?lái)的關(guān)系并非人們想象的那樣膚淺、沒(méi)有任何感情投入。相反，由于人們?cè)诰W(wǎng)絡(luò)空間中表達(dá)自己的時(shí)候會(huì)比平時(shí)更加坦白、誠(chéng)實(shí)、無(wú)拘無(wú)束，因此網(wǎng)友們之間往往可以建立起很親密的關(guān)系。"
加文對(duì)42名年齡從19到26歲的聊天室?？瓦M(jìn)行了深度采訪。在這些自愿被訪者中，29人和網(wǎng)友有著親密的朋友關(guān)系或者網(wǎng)戀的經(jīng)歷，其中21人正計(jì)劃和網(wǎng)友見(jiàn)面。還有一對(duì)網(wǎng)友如今已經(jīng)結(jié)為夫妻。
3月15日在英國(guó)布來(lái)克浦舉行的英國(guó)心理學(xué)學(xué)會(huì)（British Psychological Society）的年會(huì)上加文對(duì)自己的這一研究結(jié)果作了陳述。他說(shuō)："多數(shù)情況下，當(dāng)網(wǎng)友們第一次見(jiàn)面時(shí)，他們能夠很自然的由網(wǎng)上的角色過(guò)渡到現(xiàn)實(shí)生活中的真實(shí)角色，因?yàn)樗麄儽舜艘呀?jīng)十分熟悉了。"
他還說(shuō)："在網(wǎng)上，男人在情感上會(huì)更加坦誠(chéng)，而女人們?cè)谟懻搩尚詥?wèn)題的時(shí)候也不再遮遮掩掩。"
 加文在研究結(jié)果中還說(shuō)多數(shù)網(wǎng)上聊天者在介紹自己的身高或者頭發(fā)顏色時(shí)都會(huì)耍一些小小的"伎倆"，撒一些善意的謊言。但多數(shù)情況下，這些謊言只是同實(shí)際情況稍有不符，而并非完全的捏造。
加文說(shuō)："他們這么做還是希望自己的外表能夠符合世俗的標(biāo)準(zhǔn)。所以男士在向網(wǎng)友介紹自己的時(shí)候，往往把自己形容成金發(fā)碧眼的人，女性網(wǎng)友則把自己說(shuō)成是一位金發(fā)女郎或者將自己的胸圍稍稍夸大一點(diǎn)。"
"當(dāng)然，在這些被訪者中還是有12個(gè)人在網(wǎng)上所說(shuō)的話(huà)完全是捏造的，而其余被訪者只是將事實(shí)夸大了一點(diǎn)點(diǎn)。"
(中國(guó)日?qǐng)?bào)網(wǎng)站譯)
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Updated: 2002-03-20 01:00
