2011-05-13 08:59
The confused girl returned to her mother and said, "Mom, how is it possible that you told me the human race was created by God, and Dad said they developed from monkeys?"
2011-05-12 08:52
The child comes home from his first day at school. Mother asks, “What did you learn today?” The kid replies, “Not enough. I have to go back tomorrow.”
2011-05-11 08:54
Finally the little girl asks, “Grandpa, did God make you?” “He sure did honey, a long time ago,” replies her grandpa. “Well, did God make me?” asks the little girl. “Yes, He did, and that wasn’t too long ago,” answers her grandpa.
2011-05-10 08:39
Again the boy made no attempt to answer, so the clergyman raised his voice even more and shook his finger in the boy’s face, “WHERE IS GOD?”
2011-05-09 09:03
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human, it was physically impossible.
2011-05-06 09:40
The female dormitory will be out-of-bounds for all male students, and the male dormitory to the female students. Anybody caught breaking this rule will be fined $20 the first time.
2011-05-05 09:50
“Sir,” the cop says. “Why do you have all those knives?” “They’re for my juggling act,” the man says. “I don’t believe you,” says the cop. “Prove it.”
2011-05-03 10:08
One day a lawyer was riding in his limousine when he saw a guy eating grass. He told the driver to stop. He got out and asked him, "Why are you eating grass?"
2011-04-28 12:32
The third woman says, "I always know where my husband is." "Impossible!" both women say, "He has you completely fooled!" "Oh no," says the woman. "I'm a widow."
2011-04-26 10:39
When asked what the problem was, the wife went into a passionate, painful tirade listing every problem they had ever had in the 20 years they had been married.
2011-04-25 13:07
My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished two bags of chips and a chocolate cake.
2011-04-21 13:47
It was a May-December marriage, and as the old man climbed into bed for the first time with his new bride, he asked, “Did your mother tell you what to do on your wedding night?”
2011-04-20 10:56
After all of the background checks, interviews, and testing were done there were three finalists -- two men and one woman. For the final test, the CIA agents took one of the men to a large metal door and handed him a gun.
2011-04-19 14:24
One day, the younger of the two ladies, turns to the other and says, “Please don”t be angry with me, dear, but I am embarrassed, after all these years. What is your name? I am trying to remember, but I just can’t.”
2011-04-18 10:59
There once was a scientist who studied frogs. One day, the scientist put the frog on the ground and told it to jump. The frog jumped four feet. So the scientist wrote in his notebook, “Frog with four feet, jumps four feet.”
2011-04-13 09:55
“Do you notice anything unusual about me?” he asked the first candidate. “Yes. You have no ears.” He quickly eliminated the first candidate.
2011-04-11 09:26
The woman not understanding the rules says, “I have no idea what number to play?” A young, good-looking man nearby suggests she play her age. Smiling at the man, she puts her money on number 24.
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